An exercise for the study of inner biases.

An exercise perhaps best done with eyes closed.
Suppose someone bumps into me.  Or perhaps I am not looking where I'm going: suppose, without seeing him or her, I bump into someone.  Just a bump: no injury, pain, or loss of balance and nothing from which haste or any other attribute of the other could be surmised.  Suppose I know nothing about the other person: not race, gender, age, mood, appearance, social status, height, weight or anything else except that we bumped?  What is my reaction?  
Does my reaction change after I learn his or her race?  
Gender? 
Age? 
Appearance?  Does my reaction change based on whether the person is well-dressed and good looking?  Disheveled?  Dirty?  Ugly or disfigured?
Apparent mood or manner?  Suppose the person is grumpy?  Hostile?  Apologetic - or not?  Sad?  Cheerful? 
Does my reaction change after I learn the other person's reaction to the bump?  What reaction of the other person triggers what reaction in me?What other imagined attributes trigger changes in my reaction to the person?
What are the changes in my reaction, compared to my imagined reaction when I knew nothing about the other person?  Where in my psyche or experience do those reactions come from?  
Do my reactions serve me - including by pointing areas of needed growth?

Conversing to learn, not impress.

Each person has many gifts, interests, opinions.  Each person can teach me many things, sometimes directly, by news or instruction; sometimes indirectly, by what I can infer from his or her experiences and views.  If, in conversation and in relationship, I seek to discover those gifts, interests, and opinions; if I seek to learn from the person I'm with; I never lack for topics of conversation.  Bonus: being interested in the other, and particularly in learning from him or her, usually makes me seem more interesting than when I am passive, let alone when I seek to reinforce my perception of my importance.

Fear is a poor substitute for a reason.

Fear, particularly fear of regret, is a poor substitute for a reason for a decision.

August 13, 2017

I recently finished an extraordinary book entitled How Emotions Are Made, by neuropsychologist Lisa Feldman Barrett.  The book explains how concepts formed by personal experience and culture are stored, tested and modified in the human brain, and how those concepts, not neurological “hard-wiring”, create our emotions. 

The book also draws the distinction between the human brain as an organ – as a supercomputer, if you will – and the human mind.  The brain is truly amazing.  But my experience is that the mind can access love, wisdom, strength, and courage which can guide us in situations beyond our ken and which are not explainable by the cells and synapses, and the concepts and knowledge stored, much unconsciously, in the brain.  That experience is enough evidence for me of the presence of that of God in every person; of the Holy Spirit available to every person whenever we call upon it; if we will only call upon it. 

That Spirit is, to me, what answers when I ask, “What of God can I bring to this moment?”

What of the life, the love, and the loaf given to me am I willing to share with others?

July 23, 2017

I have been wondering whether there is fundamental religious authority for the self-righteousness I find in myself and which seems so prevalent in our nation these days. I know of no such authority in The Bible or in Quaker writings.  To the contrary, I turn to First Corinthians, chapter 13, which says there will always be faith, hope and love.  I think faith, being profoundly personal and often powerful, can be a foundation for self-righteousness.  Hope, which is also personal, even when it is for the collective good, can lead us to be self-righteous about achieving that for which we hope.  But verse 13 of chapter 13 of First Corinthians holds that love, which is not self-seeking and rejoices in the truth; love, which is patient and kind; love, which does not boast and is not proud – love is greater than faith or hope.

Rest and contribution

It's great to feel rested. But how much better is it to feel rested after accomplishing something or making a contribution to others or to society? 
To be required to rest - to be prevented from working, whether the work is serving one's employer or contributing to one's family, friends, or local or global community; to be prevented from working to preserve and enhance one's physical and mental vigor - would be a curse.  Indeed, to be required to rest would be enervating and ultimately exhausting.  It might even make one crazy.
We develop and preserve our health and mental acuity by vigorously exercising our bodies, our minds and our compassionate spirit - balanced with healthful rest.  And, for most of us, our greatest source of fulfillment and self-worth is not how famous we are, how powerful we think we are, who we know, or how much money we have.  Our truest experience of fulfillment and self-worth comes from regularly experiencing that we contribute to the lives of others. 
 

June 25, 2017

I believe there is holiness in every person.  
I believe there is a Holy Spirit within, and available to, every person; a Spirit which is fluent in every language, understands every culture, remembers every grace and wound, and understands us better than we understand ourselves.  This Spirit will, if asked – and often unasked – guide us, comfort us, and heal us.  The Holy Spirit will forgive us, help us forgive ourselves and others, and help us grow – in part by lovingly but irresistibly requiring that we examine our assumptions and take responsibility for our choices, our laziness, and any mistreatment of others.
And when people share with each other, in word or in deed, their experience of the Holy Spirit, the magic grows.